I think I’ve managed to catch up in San Andreas to about where I was in the PS2 version, doing all of the Los Santos missions, getting dumped into the countryside by Tenpenny, and doing a few more missions out there, all today. The on-rails missions where I was running gunner were much easier on the PC, thanks to the mouse aiming.

Along the way I did the pimping missions, which took a few tries due to bad luck (the first one sent me to the airport, and I couldn’t figure out how to get to the upper level in time, and on the second I hit a slight curb and flipped the car end-over-end). I also did the ambulance mission once I was out by Angel Pines, since it’s much easier there due to the small size of the town.

Apparently I’m now working for a psychotic woman who loves robbing stores, and a drug-addled Willie Nelson-alike called The Truth. His last mission had me steal a combine thresher from a farm of right-wing survivalists, which was a rather easy mission, but it’s fun just to drive the thresher around. Though it was a bit disturbing when you ran over people and red chunks came out of the spout instead of hay bales…

Back in San Andreas, I got all of the oysters you can get to in the starting area. There are apparently ways of sequence breaking into the other areas, but there’s not as much point to it in SA, and the oysters aren’t really that important.

I then did the burglary mission, which gives me unlimited sprinting capacity as a reward, and worked on my weapon skills by blowing up cars. I started doing story missions again, primarily to get icons on the world map, and finished off Sweet’s missions for now. The DDR-ish lowrider competition was a lot easier than I remember it being on the PS2, though I did fail the first time just because I had to figure out what the PC controls were. And now I have to choose between doing missions for Ryder, Big Smoke, and Cesar.

I finished off the rest of the tags in San Andreas tonight, giving me a set of weapons back at the house, and then figured I should make a bit of money. Fortunately this is trivially easy in SA thanks to the betting parlor. With some save game abuse, I soon had over $5 million, and went around and bought up all the safe houses I could.

Next up I should probably collect the pearls that I can, and then maybe do some of the side missions like the burglaries or pimping (both also new to SA).

I started San Andreas today, but a lot of this will be familiar ground since I completed the first third or so on the PS2 version (up to where you get kicked out of Los Santos, at least). I was thrown a bit at first by the mouse and keyboard controls being a bit different from the previous GTA games (e.g., run and jump have been switched around), but I’m sure I’ll get used to them.

As usual, I’m going to “cheat” by jumping straight into the collection tasks in order to get easier access to weapons at my safehouse, this time by spraypainting over the tags of rival gangs (though I did have to do a couple of missions before getting access to the spraypaint can). Tagging is actually much easier in the PC version, since you just have to hold down the left mouse button, while the PS2 version required some gyrations on the controller. I only managed to get the first 50 tags tonight though, and there’s no reward for partial completion, also unlike the previous games. There will also be other things to collect, like pearls in the water and horseshoes in a later city.

Oh yeah, you can finally actually swim in this one, whereas water was near-instant death in the previous ones. There are also stats for your character that cover things like your stamina, sex appeal, fatness, and strength, and you have skill levels in how well you can use various firearms and vehicles, all of which can be raised through use.

And in other differences, the textures are much better than the earlier games, you can have your gang take over enemy gang areas (though I know that it’s not worthwhile this early since you wind up losing them and having to retake them later on), there are a lot more simultaneous cars on the road, the drivers in this one are much more aggressive, and I’ve had a few actually follow me around and ram me in retaliation. Oh they’ll be sorry when I get that AK-47 spawn at the house…

I went and did one more asset mission tonight, the boatyard race I complained about before, even though it took a good half-dozen frustrating tries. The reason? Doing so made the next story mission easier; without the boatyard, some thugs would head straight for the car showroom to steal my money, but with the boatyard completed, they’d head there first, giving me time to get to the showroom before them. A tank I’d parked there then made dealing with them much easier when they showed up.

And after that it was on to the last storyline mission. This one was fairly tough, as you might expect for a final mission, since there are multiple phases to it (defending my office, bumping off Lance after he goes traitor, and dealing with Sonny), and Sonny apparently has an infinite number of bodyguards streaming in from out of nowhere. A few attempts were also cut short by bad rocket targeting, where it would explode in my face because it got caught on some railing or something that I couldn’t see very well. But I persevered and eventually finished Sonny off with no armour and only 50 health left.

And that was Vice City. As with GTA3, there’s still stuff to do afterward (I never even started the Haitian and Cuban missions), but I don’t really have the time. Instead, since I’m on a roll, I think I’ll jump straight into San Andreas. There are plenty of other good games coming out right now, but the PC version of GTA4 has been delayed, Saints Row 2 isn’t out for the PC yet either (I’m waiting to see comparisons between it and the 360 version before deciding), and it could be a while before I get my Fable 2 LE key or copy of Fallout 3 (should be shipping soon).

Since I couldn’t progress any further in the Vice City storyline, I decided to spend tonight working on the asset missions.

The Kaufman Cabs ones were fairly easy and I can now get a zebra-stripe-painted cab from there anytime I want. The printing works missions were fairly straightforward, and then I did the ones for the movie studio. This one was notable for having the only plane mission I’ve seen so far, where I had to drop flyers advertising a porno the studio is shooting. It took a few tries to get used to the controls, but once I was out of the cramped downtown area it was fairly easy.

Then I went back and did the ice cream mission, where I had to sell it to 50 people. I got busted by sudden cops out of nowhere the last couple times I tried, but this time I kept flipping to the backwards camera to keep an eye out for them and finished it without trouble.

And then I finally got the call indicating that trouble is brewing, and the main story will soon continue. I only have 52% completion overall, but I think there are only two more main missions left.

I started on Vercetti’s missions in Vice City, and the first one unlocked the ability to buy companies around the city. They’ll earn money for me, and have some extra missions and rewards associated with them. I did the car collection one, which lets me pick up four unique car types at the showroom. I also tried the boat race at the boatyard, but gave up after a few tries. The boat handling is just frustrating in a race scenario like that.

I completed a couple more of Vercetti’s missions, and in one amusing incident, I had just finished a mission and was standing around answering a cell phone call afterwards. Someone then casually just strolled up, got into the bulletproof Admiral I had been using, and started driving away. Since I was still on the cell phone, I couldn’t jack it back or even run, so I had to walk after him as he drove away. Fortunately he didn’t drive very quickly and was slowed down by several corners, so he was still in sight as the lengthy cell phone call ended and I could finally run up and get the car back. I did not want to lose that one in particular.

I think I’m actually fairly close to the end of the main storyline, though there are still plenty of those side missions left to do. Things are looking a little strained between me and Lance, though…

I finally started on the main storyline missions in Vice City, and it actually wasn’t too long before I’d unlocked the other islands anyway, unlike GTA3 where you didn’t unlock the third until fairly late. Out of the early missions, the most notable ones were one where I had to control an RC helicopter to plant bombs — the controls were extremely hard to get used to, so it took a good half-dozen tries. And in another one I got to play gunner in a helicopter while we strafed the hell out of a few gang-infested buildings. Along the way I also got a Tubbs-like partner named Lance, and a glitched, nearly indestructible car from one of the missions.

With the islands fully open, I could finally do the vigilante mission, too. My first try failed when I got busted trying to swap tanks, but the second one was successful, if chaotic. It’s hard to control a tank when it’s constantly getting slammed by police cars.

Eventually, Lance got captured trying to take revenge against the crime boss who killed his brother, so I had to go rescue him. In retaliation, we stormed the boss’s mansion (reminiscent of the one in Scarface) and took him out (in a scene also straight out of Scarface), so it’s mine now. There are some missions I can do for myself, but I went and finished off some other missions for a biker gang and a stereotypical British metal band first.

I took another shot at Vice City and caught back up to where I was before, with the final package, all of the save point properties bought, and a stolen tank in the garage. The tank will be useful for the Vigilante missions, but I can’t seem to do those right now; it won’t trigger properly on the west island, and I can’t take the tank back to the east island while the barriers are still up.

So, instead I worked on some other side mission types. I did cab fares for a while, which were fairly easy on the west side since the routes often take me right past a pay-n-spray. I managed to do 50 fares before accidentally flipping the taxi, which is only halfway to the reward, but it’s not that great a reward anyway. I then tried to do the pizza delivery missions, but couldn’t do them on the west side since some of the deliveries went to areas still blocked off (another consequence of sequence breaking), but I went back to the east island and did it there. The deliveries were fairly easy, and I now have 150 health maximum.

I’m already at 13% completion according to the stats screen, even though I haven’t even started the main missions yet. It’s probably about time I did though, since working my way past these barriers on the islands is a bit of a pain and preventing me from working on those other missions.

Well, I managed to get into the west side of the city in Vice City by abusing a series of ramps near the movie studio and bridge, and got the rest of the hidden packages, but getting the very last one was a royal pain in the ass.

I needed a boat for the last two packages, and I got one by landing a helicopter (easily obtained in the west city) on the locked-off docks. I picked up the second-last package, but triggered a Rampage mission while walking up to it. It was a fairly easy one, picking off boats with a rocket launcher, but I aimed a little too far to the right once and hit the fence next to me, killing me. In order to get that very last package, barely a stone’s throw from where I already was, I had to go back to the ramps, break into the west city, steal a helicopter, fly it all the way across the map back to the east side, land on the docks, and get a boat again. Argh.

One of the things unlocked by those packages was the tank, but I still had to go get it from the army base. I bought a condo on the north side of the west city to store it in, headed to the army base and charged in, got the tank, and then hit a light pole on the way out. That let the army guys grab me out of the tank, and although they didn’t bust me, I couldn’t get back in the tank without them instantly pulling me out again. They were also shooting at me and it wasn’t long before they’d worn down my health, so I figured I’d just reload and try again.

Except that my last save game put me back in the east city, with that one last package still to go. ARGH. I thought I’d saved after buying the condo, but apparently not, so I get to do it all over again.